Nice screensaver

Roy:"Them glasses are shit innnit!!"
Moss cries:"It's too real Roy, it's too real!"


Roy:"Nice glasses!"
Moss:"ohh yeahhh ahhhh maybe the reason why I have to wear glasses is because I suffer from short-sightedness, I can't put contact lenses in because I'm frightened of touching my eyes...I can't...there's no way...these glasses...I can't...there's no way...yeah..."


Moss:"4, I mean 5, I mean FIRE!"

From today, dialling 999 won't get you the emergency services. So, remember the new number:
0118 999 881 999 119 725... 3

Subject: Fire.
I'm writing to inform you about a fire which has broken out at the premises of....no that's too formal.

FIRE (exclamation mark), FIRE (exclamation mark)
Help me (exclamation mark)

Looking forward to hearing from you,
all the best,
Maurice Moss.